Transitting

I have left Kovalam. Feel like it penetrated deeper somehow and I will return but who knows what lies in store....? I left in a whirlwind, becoming very emotional when saying goodbye to the women who were eating dinner when my lift came, and I tried to shout 'Poito Varen Nan romba virenburem' but it stuck in my throat, and my roommate finished my sentence on my behalf, one of the women got up to come and kiss my cheek, and they all shouted 'bye', I didn't feel like I was able to punctuate my stay with the community like I usually would, because of the language issue, but I kept pestering the SW in charge about it, and she assured me that she was informing the residents of my time periods etc.
I emailed my journal to all of the managers before I left, and felt a bit wary as it contained very honest accounts of my experiences.... Byut I was extremely pleased to receive replies from several of the managers saying that they appreciate my insights and expected that a lot of changes would occur because of them!! WOWEE!! That feel really positive!
So now I head to Kolcata tomorrow morning, I am a tourist again for a while before I begin my next project in Lehdakh, working to improve access to education for children with disabilities.

Becoming a native

My friend Jeeva took me to see a Tamil film the other night and I was very excited about how much I understood. Speaking Tamil is still quite stilted apart from familiar conversations that I have mastered, but I am now understanding quite a lot. Great for my confidence. My body has become accustomed to the heat, 42C is the average daily temperature, and although this floored me to begin with, these days if I sit in a A/C room, which brings the temp to 20C then I am shivering.
My friend Sathya Murthy saw a 2 metre long snake (pambu) crossing our wee track the other day!! Certainly from the tracks in the sand it seems they are common here.
My birthday yesterday was wonderful, everyone made it very special, they have all been so kind to me and are very keen for me to return. I have been well looked after here, I have not been sick since arriving, and always treated like a princess 'Kamala Madam' is how I am called (despite protests!!).
I brought a 5kg bday cake for everyone, this went down very well "Happy Birthday Kamala"
I have been offered the job of activities coordinater (my suggestion). I will leave here on sunday I think but may well return to take up the post in november.... life permitting....
I gave a presentation today 'A Scottish perspective on MH care' and despite having no current, it was very successful with much intersting discussion
Feels like I got a message across and some adjustments to organisation were made in theory at least.
Pleased but very tired, all day long, talking, sharing, inspiring.....

Philosoohising about living

I am in the midst of watching and living and completing cycles, like the moon, which climaxes this month on the morning of my birth date 20th May. I am pretty knackered, I am working very hard, with only 1 week left of this voluntary placement. I have a lot of finishing off to do.
The Banyan have offered me a job! Crikes, biggie..... Basically they have said that they want to keep me, and will allow me to create a job for myself! Wow- what an opportunity, great for my career, there is so much scope here, I mean from real basics, like regular supervision of the staff, like the that is language used, the involvement of people in their own recovery, community development... to name but a few.... so the question is whether I could take the job and not kill myself by working too hard, and not alienate myself to the existing staff by bringing on too many changes too quickly. These are the issues really, they are prepared to be very flexible about my working times, to give me time to return to the UK to see my several times extended family, so it is workable but still a big decision. My instinct says give it a go at least for a while, but i am also aware that this is the 1st place I have come to in India. I also feel like I my adventure is becoming a work one, and I'm not sure I want this to happen.....
I went to visit the Goverment's Institute of Mental Health in Chennai yesterday. My heart was broken all over again, 1500 people in this hospital, in very lovely grounds, but boxed into 'ward areas' dreadfully understaffed, and dirty and dismal buildings. I visited a female ward, the women are all in uniform, a totally shapeless dress, apparently they only have one dress so that while it is in the laundry they have to be naked. One woman who i chatted to (through an interpreter as she spoke Hini and not Tamil) was totally traumatised because the staff had given her a haircut, but it was gruesome, they had hacked her hair to bits, this had set her into a terrible state druelling and trembling. Poor lady. I am in awe of how the women are so smiley and beautiful through this hell that they live through every day.
SHIT. I felt like I was walking through a film that Steve showed us of MH care 100 years ago.
Having magical moments too, I saw a comet when I was with a friend in Mahamallapurum. And making new friends, from my culture and others. Like talking with a lovely Swami about philosophy and tourism, and making observations about my own personal journey through Indian culture.
I will tell one story that I know will make those who know me laugh knowingly, i started freaking because we went to a touristy place in Pondicherry and western women were walking around with practically nothing on, it seems almost pornographic to me now, and when we visited a temple, I got chatting to a Dutch tourist about Pakistan, he said 'Muslims are dangerous', well this was like showing a red rug to a bull of course..... My new friends were laughing at me, 'but we thought you were so chilled out', perhaps others recognise this....